March 15th, 2026
by Mercedes Behnke
by Mercedes Behnke
I have just finished a book called "What a Difference a Mom Makes" (to her son) by Dr. Kevin Leman.
I really needed to read this book and I'm sure I will be reading it again at some point. I must admit, I have butted heads a lot with our oldest son. We are similar in some traits and compete for the podium. Sometimes I get so frustrated with him I literally just don't like him at all. And my attitude shows it.
That's bad.
I think one of the things I have learned more about from this book is that I really need to focus more on what he has done right, and not so much where he can improve on. What he has done right. I view myself as a teacher and teachers correct their pupils mistakes.
I also have been reminded that just because I do not see any improvement in him doesn't mean that the correction and teaching and love I am giving him is going unnoticed or implemented. I must remind myself on a daily basis that he is human, inexperienced, different, and a child.
Being a mother that cares and desires her children to be warriors for Christ is so very difficult and hard. I must hold balance in love and discipline, in patience and efficiency in my expectations and grace. Constantly reviewing the fact that I to am human, flawed and corrupt. Christ and his grace must be accepted by me first, and only then can it be passed into another soul. For I cannot give away and teach that which I do not have or understand.
Really, attitude change in my son starts with me.
To fully accept my son, I must fully accept myself and to give him grace, I must allow it to myself.
So much easier said then done. The first step to improvements is recognizing there is a problem. I'm going to warp him, I know I will! Hopefully it will just be a small warp-age!
So, this reminds me of a cute story about when our oldest daughter was about 3 and she was playing with play dough at the table. She was rolling out little rolls of dough and sweetly looked up at me and said, " mommy, would you like big or little mistakes?" I replied the smallest you can do please! Ha!
~Prudence
I really needed to read this book and I'm sure I will be reading it again at some point. I must admit, I have butted heads a lot with our oldest son. We are similar in some traits and compete for the podium. Sometimes I get so frustrated with him I literally just don't like him at all. And my attitude shows it.
That's bad.
I think one of the things I have learned more about from this book is that I really need to focus more on what he has done right, and not so much where he can improve on. What he has done right. I view myself as a teacher and teachers correct their pupils mistakes.
I also have been reminded that just because I do not see any improvement in him doesn't mean that the correction and teaching and love I am giving him is going unnoticed or implemented. I must remind myself on a daily basis that he is human, inexperienced, different, and a child.
Being a mother that cares and desires her children to be warriors for Christ is so very difficult and hard. I must hold balance in love and discipline, in patience and efficiency in my expectations and grace. Constantly reviewing the fact that I to am human, flawed and corrupt. Christ and his grace must be accepted by me first, and only then can it be passed into another soul. For I cannot give away and teach that which I do not have or understand.
Really, attitude change in my son starts with me.
To fully accept my son, I must fully accept myself and to give him grace, I must allow it to myself.
So much easier said then done. The first step to improvements is recognizing there is a problem. I'm going to warp him, I know I will! Hopefully it will just be a small warp-age!
So, this reminds me of a cute story about when our oldest daughter was about 3 and she was playing with play dough at the table. She was rolling out little rolls of dough and sweetly looked up at me and said, " mommy, would you like big or little mistakes?" I replied the smallest you can do please! Ha!
~Prudence
Mercedes Behnke
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